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Self-esteem is an important part of promoting and maintaining our overall well-being. It influences everything from how we perceive ourselves and interact with the world around us to our beliefs about our worth, abilities, and value as individuals. When we’re able to maintain a balanced perspective, we recognize our strengths and acknowledge our weaknesses without allowing them to define us. This is healthy self-esteem, and building and maintaining it is so important in leading a fulfilling life. Individuals with healthy self-esteem are more likely to take risks, pursue their goals, and engage in meaningful relationships. When we have healthy self-esteem, we’re also able to build resilience, which allows us to bounce back from any setbacks we might meet and view challenges as opportunities for growth rather than a reflection of our self-worth. Low self-esteem, on the other hand, does the complete opposite. When we have low self-esteem, we’re at risk of developing other concerns like anxiety, depression, and a sense of inadequacy or low self-worth, which can negatively influence our personal and professional growth. As amazing as healthy self-esteem sounds, it does require us to put in intentional effort and self-awareness to get there. Understanding the importance of self-esteem is the first step toward building a positive self-image and healthy self-esteem, but there are many other ways to actively challenge your negative self-talk and begin to build a stronger you!
One way to build healthy self-esteem is through self-awareness. This involves taking time to reflect on our thoughts, feelings, and behaviors. Journaling can be an amazing tool in building self-awareness! When we write about our experiences and emotions, we can start to notice any patterns of negative self-talk or limiting beliefs that we might be holding onto. This awareness is the first step in challenging any negative self-talk and limiting beliefs we might have and allow us to replace them with more positive and realistic affirmations (we’ll come back to how you can do this!).
Another essential aspect of building self-esteem is setting realistic goals. When we set unrealistic standards for our achievement, we’re less likely to consistently meet our goals, which can damage our self-esteem over time. When we set achievable and realistic goals for ourselves, though, we create more opportunities for success, which can help us build healthy self-esteem. Try starting with smaller, manageable goals or standards that align with your interests and values. Even celebrating your accomplishments, no matter how small they may seem, can be an incredibly beneficial practice in building self-esteem. This reinforces a sense of both competence and achievement, which will gradually boost self-esteem over time. As you accomplish these smaller goals, you can explore more challenging ones over time, further enhancing your confidence.
Beyond ourselves, though, the people we spend our time with can also have a significant impact on our self-perception, self-worth, and self-esteem. Surrounding yourself with positive influences is another way to build healthy self-esteem. When we seek out relationships that are supportive, encouraging, and uplifting and distance ourselves from those who are consistently negative or critical, our self-worth and confidence grows! Spending time with people in your life who celebrate your successes and provide constructive feedback is so beneficial for our self-esteem.
Practicing self-compassion is another vital component of building healthy self-esteem. We’re often our own worst critics and holding ourselves to unrealistic standards like we previously discussed. Instead of focusing on your failures and that critical voice, practice treating yourself with the same kindness and understanding that you would offer a friend. Try asking yourself, “What would I say to my best friend if they were experiencing this?” when you find you’re being especially hard on yourself for a mistake or a missed accomplishment. You can also practice acknowledging that everyone makes mistakes and try to look at these experiences as opportunities for growth instead. By developing self-compassion, you can build a more forgiving and nurturing relationship with yourself, increasing your self-confidence.
Mindfulness and self-care practices can also play an important role in enhancing and building self-esteem. Mindfulness encourages us to be present in the moment, allowing us to observe our thoughts and feelings without judgment. This practice can help reduce anxiety and negative self-talk, allowing you to build a more balanced perspective about yourself. By incorporating self-care routines into your daily life—exercise, hobbies, meditating, eating nutritious food, allowing yourself time to rest—can also promote a sense of well-being and self-worth. Remaining present, taking time for yourself, and addressing your needs and happiness will help in building healthy self-esteem over time.
Finally, seeking professional help can be beneficial in addressing low self-esteem.
Therapists and counsellors can provide valuable insights and strategies for overcoming negative self-perception and limiting beliefs. They can create a safe space for self-exploration and growth with you, allowing you to find the root causes of your low self-esteem and guide you in developing healthier ways to cope. One effective strategy for building healthy self-esteem that is often introduced in therapy is challenging negative beliefs. Often, our self-esteem is influenced by deeply ingrained beliefs about ourselves that may not be accurate. Identifying the beliefs that contribute to our low self-esteem and examine their validity is the first step. Then, you can consider whether there is real evidence to support this limiting belief, or if it’s just an assumption you’ve made about yourself for one reason or another. Working together with your therapist or counsellor to explore your negative or limiting beliefs and replace them with positive affirmations can help reshape your self-image over time, leading to healthier self-esteem over time.
Remember, building healthy self-esteem is a journey, not a destination. It takes time, consistent effort, and self-reflection to get there. Each step you take toward building healthy self-esteem is a step toward a more fulfilling and confident life. By fostering self-awareness, setting realistic goals, surrounding yourself with positive influences, practicing self-compassion, and challenging negative beliefs, you can build and maintain healthy self-esteem. If self-esteem is something you’re struggling with, consider booking a consultation with one of our therapists today!
References
Centre for Clinical Interventions (2019, November 5). Resources for clinicians: Self-esteem. https://www.cci.health.wa.gov.au/Resources/For-Clinicians/Self-Esteem
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